Kan you keep up?

So, my friend at work is talking about her boyfriend issues and a few things came across my mind.

Many times when we get into relationships (& friendships) we have all these expectations about what they should be and what they should not be. Listen people, if your significant other does not appear to conform to your way of philosophical views or if you feel the insatiable urge to constantly want to keep up, it is a HUGE possibility that the person you are with, is not for you!

Here are some "tail-tail" signs:

1. The person makes multiple inferences about a way of life that you know nothing about. Who's fault is it that you both didn't have the same walk of life? If the person seems to be making you feel bad because you're not "urban" enough or if you're too "privileged", tell them to kick rocks!

2. If your significant other always brags about things that you do not have, chuck the doggone deuces. Being with someone is not supposed to make you feel more empty or feel as though you are more at a deficit. The number one purpose in a relationship to bring joy and happiness to someone else's life. PS: this goes for friendships also. If someone is constantly trying to prove something to you that they have 9 times out of 10 they really have nothing that matters. This also brings about an unhealthy competitive energy to the kinship. If we're together, no one should compete for anything. It should be an equal level playing ground.

3. If the person you are with always has their hand stretched out but never, NEVER, never offers to help anyone else, guess what? They are a LEECH! This generation has yet to learn the true meaning of serving others. Karma really does exist. When you do for others it will come back to you, but sometimes we should have an innate ability to want to help and serve others. Now, I'm not talking about being a punk or pushover and do whatever someone asks of you, but i am suggesting that you truly assist those who are in need of something you have to offer.

4. Finally, this is one of the most important things, if the person is SO willing to change everything you suggest, then they don't know who they are and they are NOT ready to be in a relationship. one whole and one half does not look or taste good. For example, if you're baking a cake and one layer is cooked all the way and the other still has cake batter in the center, then the cake is not done and can not be edible. Same thing goes for a relationship. If you know who you are and you know what you want, why settle for someone who is not there yet. Let them wait for the next turn on the relationship wheel.

Again, I have been there and done that. I have gotten into so many relationships and have changed because of who they wanted me to be and in the mean time I lost who I was and I lost sight of what I wanted and I SETTLED for me being broken and that's how the vicious cycle starts. We sell ourselves to so many people because we crave to be apart of someone's life and experience, but take pride in yourself and learn that you have more to offer yourself than by being in a relationship where both people are trying to keep up with each other. Stop getting into relationships and try to make that person what you want, when thats NOT WHO THEY ARE!

Got me? Good...